Posts by: Bené Viera

It is not uncommon for the mister and I to discuss a range of topics while eating dinner. We laugh, get passionate, and agree to disagree on everything from the latest news to celebrities to thought provoking articles we’ve read. Usually the conversation shifts to the state of our community because this is one of [...]

Continue Reading

It was in 2009 when the state of black women’s singleness became newsworthy, studied by experts and a topic that everyone from bloggers to self-proclaimed relationship experts couldn’t stop writing about. Everyone from Nightline to the Washington Post weighed in on the “something must be wrong with black women” meme. Including black men.

[...]

Continue Reading

Outgrowing Friends

On December 15, 2010 By

 

Remember those white sweatshirt hoodies with the red stitching we had? Mine read “Bené” yours “Tish?” We thought we were too fly. Best friends since the second grade who met because your stepmom and my mom were best friends. “The Five Heartbeats” to this day is our favorite movie. Relatives insisted we sing all [...]

Continue Reading

Love is a Verb

On December 13, 2010 By

It’s not surprising that too many women are confused as to what love really looks like. None of us realized as little girls the mountains we would have to climb as women in areas of life and love. By our mid-twenties, too many of us have experienced the pain of infidelity, men walking away from [...]

Continue Reading

Can Kanye Live?

On November 15, 2010 By

On the cusp of Kanye’s  new album, “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy,” those of us who didn’t read Bush’s memoir were alerted to the shout out he gave Kanye in his book. Only it wasn’t really a shout out.  Apparently Kanye’s nationally broadcasted opinion, “George Bush doesn’t care about black people,” was the worst moment [...]

Continue Reading

Shacking Up

On November 8, 2010 By

One of the fastest routes to changing the course of your relationship is moving in with your significant other.

Economically cohabitation is beneficial when you live in a metropolitan city where the cost of living is significantly higher than rural areas. Ideally two incomes paying one set of bills equals significant savings for everyone involved. [...]

Continue Reading

* SPOILER ALERT: If you haven’t seen the film you may not want to read any further. There are a few spoilers.

Opening night I sat in a packed theater of folks who I’m certain had never heard of Ntozake Shange to see Tyler Perry’s adaptation of the 1975 choreopoem For Colored Girls Who [...]

Continue Reading

Yesterday, I rushed to the city to meet with a guy of a well-known business. *John was very chilled, laid back and deeply passionate about the brand he worked for even with the picture of him w/the Vice President at the White House on his bookshelf. It was the most informal interview I’d ever had, [...]

Continue Reading

More on Natural Hair

On October 13, 2010 By

In July I wrote “The Hair Politics of Natural vs. Permed, a commentary article for Essence’s website after growing tired of the divisive debate and natural hair roll call on Twitter. In the article I admit the topic has been discussed ad nauseum, and how unproductive that debate can be.  On [...]

Continue Reading

The Double Consciousness

On October 6, 2010 By

“One ever feels his twoness-an American, a Negro; two souls, two thoughts, two unreconciled strivings; two warring ideals in one dark body, whose dogged strength alone keeps it from being torn asunder.” – W. E. B. DuBois

Me: I’m thinking of shutting down the blog.

 

SO: Why?

 

Me: I [...]

Continue Reading